Singer-Songwriter Winona Oak on How the Strength of the Women in Her Life Shaped Her Music and Helped Her Find Confidence
PHOTO by JULIAN GILLSTROM
One of my earliest musical memories takes place in my grandma’s old house, a cozy little cabin deep in the woods that blends in perfectly with earth’s untouched nature. She was playing zither and singing folk songs to me in Swedish. I don’t remember the name of the songs, I just remember sitting there mesmerized on the floor next to a crackling fireplace as she filled the room with her voice. And wow, what a voice she had. To be frank, she would always make sure to be heard whenever she entered a room. I’ve never met a person in my entire life who could talk like that. She would babble for hours without caring if anyone was listening, and it was a lost battle trying to utter a word in her presence. Until one day when her biggest fear came true—she had a stroke and lost her speech.
Learning how to communicate again was painful and hard; not only did she lose her beautiful voice but with it she also lost a big part of her identity. I felt powerless, but for some reason she trusted me to help her. Out of all the adults in her life, she chose an 8-year-old girl to be her main rehabilitation person. I spent hours playing cards, painting, and singing for her as she struggled to find the words again. We found our own little way of communicating, and I think the fact that I was still just a kid with a pure and free soul made me understand her better than anybody else. You know, as we grow older we tend to complicate things… and children are the epitome of love. We say that they should learn from us, but we definitely have a lot to learn from them.
Winona Oak’s grandma / PHOTOS courtesy of WINONA OAK
My grandma’s new favorite activity was to patiently watch me dance, sing, and play violin, piano, and guitar. Not that I was a super talent or anything, but she didn’t judge me. She just smiled and seemed very impressed with every little show that I’d put together. I even made tickets and invited my whole family to watch me perform and thrived knowing that they were all there just to listen to me (early signs of a narcissist anyone...?). Show after show, day after day she slowly relearned how to communicate. She never got her voice back completely, but she definitely improved a lot. And if that doesn’t teach you the healing power of music I don’t know what will.
Here I am, years later, wishing that she could watch me perform a real show, and wishing that she could teach me how to play that zither that she gave me. It has the words “to my sunlight” engraved in the back, and when she passed away, I decided to always carry that light with me. It's in the soul of my music, it's a part of me. And I see it in so many other women out there. It took me quite some time to find confidence in such a male-dominated line of work (and world), but now that I found my voice I am not going to be silenced. When we as women understand our power and our worth we can change the way this world works.
PHOTO by JULIAN GILLSTROM
And it really needs to change. Because nowhere in this world can claim that we have the same rights and opportunities as men. Women’s rights are human rights. I want every single girl in this world to know that her voice matters. I want her to know that she’s strong as hell and that she’s the only one who should be in charge of her own beautiful body and sexuality. The future is yours and your story matters. Be the light.
STORY WINONA OAK
Growing up surrounded by a musical family, singer-songwriter Winona Oak took to music early in her childhood. The Swedish singer-songwriter recently released her single “Nobody Loves Me” in collaboration with ELIO in honor of International Women’s Day.